The internet offers anything and everything. This can be a good thing and this can be a bad thing. The internet can bring education, wholesome entertainment, and awareness to people and it can also bring out the dark side of humanity.

We can use the internet for positive things and we can use the internet for negative things. As conscious adults and caregivers and parents of children, we need to educate the youth and children on how to successfully interact with technology.

The following tips are designed to help you monitor your child's internet activity, so they have the best chances of staying safe online.

Build your relationship with your child

Make a lifetime commitment to the wellbeing of your child. This sentiment says, “No matter what happens until you are an adult, I will always love and care for you.” Strive to understand your child. Learn what your child is about. Learn what makes your child tick. 

Hug your child. Show your child physical and emotional affection. When you build your relationship with your child, you will build a stronger emotional bond with them. In turn, your child feels a sense of obligation to be loyal to what you are teaching them.

Spend quality time with your child

As a parent, life can be very busy. A parent may want to spend as much time as realistically possible with their child but in life, there is a balance between the various responsibilities. Spending quality time with your child is not necessarily about how much time you spend with them but it is about the quality of the time that you spend with them.

When you spend quality time with your child, you are engaging your child. You are checking in with the needs and preferences of your child in the present moment. You are making eye contact with your child. You are exchanging words back and forth. Perhaps, you are laughing and having a good time with your child. Whatever the external form looks like, you are being present as much as you can with your child.

You are giving your child the gift of presence.

Be emotionally available to your child

Give your child individual attention. As stated in the previous paragraph, give your child presence.

If your child needs to talk about what is on their mind, give your child some time so they can talk about their feelings and thoughts. If you cannot be available immediately, that is okay. Inform your child when in the day you can give them your full attention. Make sure, at least sometimes, you make yourself immediately available to your child.

You want your child to be independent and also you want your child, when they are still living at home, to come to you first when they are experiencing something new and need help.

Work toward having your child volunteer information

The best way to monitor your child is by having your child volunteer information. Having your child volunteer information about what is going on with their internal experience comes with time. And to have this be your child’s go-to behavior, always treat your child with dignity and respect.

Your child has a seed inside of themselves and your job is to help water the seed and help give your child what they need to succeed and have that seed grow into a strong, healthy plant.

Have and enforce house and internet rules

Discuss with your child what kind of rules your family would like to have. Ask your child how they like to be treated and then form your house rules around that. If your child can learn through positively-stated rules, then phrase them that way. Instead of saying, “Do not yell at people.” Say, “Be kind and respectful of people.” Or “Talk at an appropriate volume.”

Work to ensure internet access via your laptops and their smartphone is limited to only shared-space rooms

Many adolescents who are using the internet appropriately have no problem with using the internet in common spaces in the house such as the kitchen, living room, or office. If your child is using the internet to access inappropriate or sexually explicit material, they tend to do that in private.

If you teach your child from a young age that the computer and laptop are to be used only in the shared space rooms, then they are much more inclined to use the internet for constructive purposes. 

Consider using accountability software to filter or monitor your child’s internet activity

There are various products on the market today that are designed to help parents filter, monitor, and supervisor their children’s use of the internet. Some of the monitoring software apps also are designed to help prevent and address pornography addiction.

If you are interested in finding out more about accountability and monitoring software, visit ChristopherBueker.com; where you will find various posts the the blog that reviewing the most reputable monitoring software apps.

The aforementioned strategy for monitoring your child’s use of the internet is proactive. The more you build into your relationship with your child, the less likely your child is going to act out and use the internet for inappropriate purposes.

For most people in industrialized regions, using the internet is part of daily life. We have to learn to use the internet for constructive purposes. You can successfully monitor your child’s use of the internet through the implementation of the aforementioned steps. 

How do you monitor your child’s use of technology and the internet? Do you have experience using internet accountability software with your family? Do you allow your adolescent child to have a smartphone or laptop in their bedroom? Why or why not? Comment below with your perspective and experience.

About the Author

Christopher Bueker serves as an Addiction Therapist in a private psychiatric clinic in Cincinnati, Ohio. He practices and teaches Yoga and mindfulness and has for years. He is the author of Break Free of Chains, which a guide for parents to assist their child in overcoming pornography addiction. Mr Bueker maintains his blog at ChristopherBueker.com, which covers mindfulness, conscious living, and addiction recovery.