10 Things Dads Would Love To Know About Pregnancy
During these nine months of waiting for the baby's arrival, the future fathers ask themselves many questions... which they do not always dare to mention.
10 Things Every dad-to-be Must Know
1. Your fatherly instinct won't necessarily happen right away
Even if you really want this baby, even in cases where the desire for fatherhood is carefully considered and discussed with your partner, it is not rare that the future dad does not immediately feel invested in this new role.
The symptoms of pregnancy will immediately make the woman feel that something is changing.
It is very common for future dads to really realize only at the time of the first ultrasound or sometimes only at birth when they see their baby.
So don't panic..
Try as much as possible to involve the dad in the pregnancy by inviting him to medical examinations, for example!
There is nothing wrong with not feeling ready the moment you are pregnant.
A lot of times the fatherly instinct comes along the way and that doesn't mean you are a bad father in the making!
2. Hormones could play tricks on your wife
Baby is on the way and you are delighted!
Even though you may have heard of certain changes during pregnancy, that you hear your friends talking about hormones, you do not fully realize what this means for your partner.
But be prepared…
Pregnancy hormones can affect your partner's mood and physique, sometimes positively, sometimes less.
Thus, some pregnant women will develop hormonal acne, which is due to the activity of progesterone having the effect of increasing the sebaceous activity.
Instead of worrying, or worse, pointing out to her, reassure her!
It is only temporary, I promise.
Conversely, some women will shine, have baby skin and lioness hair!
Likewise, a large number of future dads find that their partner is not quite the same during pregnancy, loses her memory, or has mood swings.
Again, don't panic!
It's not a little seizure, it's just the hormones playing tricks on him again.
3. You can have sex during pregnancy
Great anguish of future dads: sexuality during pregnancy!
Obviously, the libido on both sides can change during this period, but not always bad.
Besides, for some women, sex is better during pregnancy. For others, it's just the opposite.
Same for dads!
Some feel an even greater desire, others are afraid of hurting their partner.
So rest assured, nothing prevents you from having sex during pregnancy, on the contrary.
Intimate relationships are safe for the baby, or your doctor will tell you.
4. Of course, you will be useful during childbirth
What if I pass out?
What if I embarrass the medical team?
What if I am not up to supporting my suffering wife?
What if I don't want her like I used to?
If there is one subject on which future dads and mothers-to-be are also stressed, it is childbirth!
For starters, you don't have to attend the birth if you really don't feel up to it.
However, be aware that you might regret this decision, both for yourself and for your partner.
Because she needs you...
Do not hesitate to discuss your anxieties together, to reassure each other.
If you finally decide to be present on D-Day in the delivery room (and we tell you, you will be happy), know that the medical team will guide you and explain where to put you and what to do.
The midwives will then offer to help them carry out first aid and, depending on the establishment, to cut the umbilical cord.
But one thing is certain: at each step, you have the choice to accept or not.
If you are really worried about this step, the best solution is probably to attend childbirth preparation classes to better understand how things unfold.
5. Your wife is about to experience pain that you did not suspect
It begins in the first trimester for some, with very disturbing pregnancy ailments.
Like Kate Middleton, some women also experience very significant nausea called Hyperemesis Gravidarum.
Then, little by little, contractions will remind him that the baby's arrival is near.
Then finally comes the day of childbirth, a very important physical effort, especially in cases where the epidural does not work or is not desired.
Postpartum convalescence is not without inconvenience either: secondary contractions, possible stitches, or even rupture of muscle tissue in the event of a cesarean section.
Your wife deserves all your esteem!
6. Your wife might be having a rough time after giving birth (and so are you)
The phenomena of baby blues or postpartum depression are explained by the hormonal upheaval that a woman undergoes who has just given birth.
The depressive state can be mild or more serious...
But keep in mind, though,
..men too can experience this phenomenon. Yep!
The nights are short, the rhythm of life changes, the return home is not always as idyllic as we thought.
The best remedy is to stick together and help each other!
7. Every pregnancy is different
In movies or series, pregnancies are similar...
It begins with incessant nausea and vomiting, then cravings for strawberries or peanut butter, the water bag cracks in the middle of the street, and poof, the baby is there.
Know that in real life, it does not (always) happen like that!!!
Some women will not experience any pregnancy ailments. Others are not going to "waste the waters" in a huge puddle.
Finally, some deliveries are very long, others very fast...
And this can vary from one woman to another, but also from one pregnancy to another.
You always have to expect the unexpected, and that's what's beautiful too.
8. You can make early recognition of paternity
If you are married to the mother-to-be, you do not have to take any steps before the birth.
You will simply have to submit a birth declaration to the town hall within 3 days of giving birth.
On the other hand, if you are not married, know that you can make an advance recognition of the paternity process.
It serves to certify that you are the father of the child if something bad happens to you before childbirth.
Your child would thus have a legally recognized father.
In practice: the procedure must be carried out before birth, in the town hall of your choice, with a simple identity document.
The document is produced immediately. However, early recognition is not compulsory.
9. You have the right to take parental leave
And yes, this right is not reserved only for the mother!
The father also has the right to choose to put aside his professional life to devote time to the education of his child.
As for the mother, dad must send an AR letter to his employer two months before the start of his parental education leave, one month if his parental education leave begins at the end of the maternity leave.
Like the mother, the father cannot begin his parental education leave as soon as the baby is born.
Indeed, he must wait until the end of maternity leave to start parental leave.
On the other hand, the father is also entitled to leave on the birth of his child.
10. But above all ... you will be a good dad
It's not just moms who are full of doubts about their ability to be a good mom to their child..
..dads also have their time of doubts, even if they often confide less!
Gentlemen, know that if you have any doubts, it's rather positive…
it reflects a real desire to be a dad at the top!
And you know what? You will be!
For more info on how to prepare for a newborn, check out our Ultimate Newborn Checklist
About The Author
Dema JS is the founder of newbabysmell.com and a mother of two little kids.
Dema had her MBA from St. John’s University- NYC in dual concentrations: Executive Management and Marketing Management.
Contact: Please email dema@newbabysmell.com or go to newbabysmell.com