Parenting In Stepfamilies: The StepFather's Role

Although it’s very rewarding, being a parent is one of the most challenging jobs a person can have. In the past, having two biological parents was the cultural norm.  

However, things are very different nowadays. Divorce rates have increased dramatically over the years, which has made blended families much more common. Some people, specifically men, are rather conflicted when marrying someone who already has a child.

Keep reading to learn the role of a stepfather and how to make the most of it. 

Misconceptions of Being a Stepfather

Unfortunately, there are a lot of misconceptions about the role of a stepfather. Just because the word “father” is in the word doesn’t necessarily mean that you are one. But that doesn’t mean you can't become a father figure. 

Stepfathers Need to Assert Dominance over Children

In some cases, new stepfathers may want to establish an authoritative role in the family. However, doing so can sometimes be next to impossible. According to many family lawyers, to gain respect and a form of authority, trust must be formed between you and the mother’s children. Most of the authority should come from the biological parent, which in this case, is the mother.  

A Stepfather Has to Replace the Biological Father

Although stepfathers have to meet a few obligations as a parent, the idea of completely replacing the natural father isn’t true. No matter how hard you try, you won’t be able to replace the biological father, even if they were a less than ideal parent.

Children may feel conflicted about receiving affection from someone other than their natural parent. Although it can seem hurtful, having feelings of being unwanted is a perfectly normal thing that many stepparents experience.

The True Role of a Stepfather

Contrary to what some might think, the goal of a stepfather isn’t to replace or make up for the biological one. Instead, their role is to be a supportive figure to everyone in the family. All it takes is to make the effort to keep the marriage happy and healthy.  

When stepchildren see that you care about their well-being and aren't trying to be an authority figure, they’ll look up to you as a positive role model. Focus on being their friend instead of another parent and soon enough, they'll come to see you as a father figure.