What San Antonio Dads Need To Know When Their Own Parents Start Aging
A Real Guide for the Sandwich Generation…
Let’s be real: being a dad already comes with a full plate—school pickups, soccer games, work deadlines, family time. But what happens when your own parents start needing help too?
If you're a dad in San Antonio juggling kids and aging parents, welcome to the sandwich generation—stuck in the middle, trying to care for those who raised you while also raising children of your own. It’s a unique and often overwhelming role, especially when you’re trying to hold it all together.
Here’s the thing: you’re not alone. San Antonio is full of families just like yours. And while this season of life isn’t easy, it doesn’t have to break you. With the right tools, local resources, and a proactive mindset, you can take care of your parents without sacrificing your own family life, career, or well-being.
Let’s walk through how.
1. Understand the Signs That Your Parents Might Need Help
Aging doesn’t look the same for everyone. Some parents stay independent well into their 80s. Others may begin to struggle earlier than expected. The key is to notice the early signs before things become an emergency.
Here are a few red flags to watch for:
Around the House:
Unopened mail stacking up
Spoiled food in the fridge
Missed trash pickup or unpaid bills
Clutter or trip hazards that didn’t used to be there
Physically:
Bruises from unexplained falls
Slower movement or difficulty getting up
Weight loss or changes in appetite
Mentally/Emotionally:
Increased forgetfulness
Confusion about time or place
Mood swings or uncharacteristic irritability
Withdrawing from activities or social events
If you notice two or more of these signs, it’s a good idea to start a conversation - gently.
2. How to Talk to Your Parents About Getting Help
This might be the hardest part. Many parents are proud and value their independence. They may not even realize how much help they need—or they may be afraid to admit it.
Here’s how to navigate this sensitive topic:
Choose the Right Time
Don’t bring it up in passing or during a stressful moment. Plan a quiet time to talk, without distractions.
Focus on Your Perspective
Instead of saying “You can’t do this anymore,” try:
“I’ve noticed you seem more tired lately, and I’m a little worried. I just want to make sure you’re okay.”
Validate Their Feelings
Let them express their fears. Many aging parents worry about losing their independence or becoming a burden.
Offer Options, Not Ultimatums
Let them know you’re there to support them, not control them. Start with small steps:
“Would it help to have someone come by once a week to help around the house?”
“There’s a local home care agency I’ve heard good things about. Want to just talk to someone?”
This is a journey—don’t expect to resolve everything in one conversation.
3. Explore the Options: What Help Actually Looks Like
Many people think the only two options are “do it all yourself” or “put mom in a nursing home.” But there’s a lot in between—especially here in San Antonio.
Home Care (Aging in Place)
This is one of the most flexible, dignified options available. With home care, trained professionals assist your parents in the comfort of their own home. They can help with:
Personal hygiene and dressing
Medication reminders
Meal preparation
Light housekeeping
Companionship and transportation
This allows your parents to maintain independence while giving you peace of mind.
Look for a reliable local service who can respond quickly as needed - for example in San Antonio, Texas Caregivers is a local agency many families trust. They specialize in in-home care that’s tailored, compassionate, and flexible. Whether your parent needs a few hours of help per week or daily assistance, a good agency will they work around your schedule and to your loved ones.
They’re not just caregivers—they’re like extended family.
4. Build Your Support Network
Caring for aging parents while raising kids can wear you down. That’s why you also need support.
Bring in Family
Have honest conversations with siblings or extended family. Divide up tasks—maybe one sibling handles doctor visits, while you manage finances.
Tap Into San Antonio Resources
Our city has great local programs for seniors and their caregivers:
Alicia Treviño López One-Stop Senior Center (Southwest SA) – Activities, meals, fitness classes
Granados Adult and Senior Center (North Central SA) – Wellness programs and social opportunities
Alamo Area Agency on Aging – Free resources and caregiver support
Also check with your local church—many offer senior visitation programs or caregiver respite services.
Don’t Forget Your Mental Health
Take breaks. Go for walks. See friends. Being strong for everyone doesn’t mean you never get tired.
Remember, your kids are watching you. Let them see that it’s okay to ask for help and take care of your own health too.
5. Create a Plan—Now, Not Later
Even if your parents are still doing fine today, now is the time to plan ahead.
Things to Think About:
Do they have a power of attorney or living will?
Where do they want to live as they age?
Who will handle things if they can’t?
What are their healthcare preferences?
Start gathering answers before they’re needed. This takes the pressure off everyone later.
And if you’re not sure where to begin, a consultation with a local expert—like Texas Caregivers—can help guide the way. Even if you’re not ready for full-time care, they can assess needs, answer questions, and help you plan for what’s next.
Final Thoughts: You’re Doing Better Than You Think
This stage of life can feel like a tug-of-war. One minute you’re reading bedtime stories to your kids, the next you’re researching fall prevention for your mom.
But here’s the good news: you don’t have to do this alone.
Take it one step at a time. Pay attention to how your parents are doing. Have honest conversations. Build your village. And when the time comes, lean on trusted help—like Texas Caregivers—to make this journey easier, safer, and more sustainable for your whole family.
Being a great dad and a great son isn’t easy—but in the process, you're modeling something beautiful for the next generation: how to honor those who came before, while still showing up for those who come after.
About the Author
Bill K. is a well-trained and experienced home care service expert specializing in senior care. With years of dedicated service, he has a deep understanding of the unique needs and challenges faced by seniors and their families.
Bill is passionate about providing valuable information and support. Through insightful and informative blogs, he aims to educate readers on various aspects of senior care, from choosing the right services to navigating the complexities of aging in place.
The author’s expertise and commitment to improving the quality of life for seniors make his writings a valuable resource for anyone seeking guidance and support in their senior care journey.